In the Back Row

with Allison McKinley © 2004

Film: Secondhand Lions
New Line Cinema (US)

Allison's review in ten words or fewer: Heartwarming adventure, well-written family film; 8 out of 10.

Young Artist Award Nomination, Leading Young Actor: Haley Joel Osment
Official site: http://www.secondhandlions.com/
Rating (USA): PG-13
Budget: $30,000,000
Starring: Robert Duvall, Michael Caine, Haley Joel Osment, Kyra Sedgwick

Warm and sentimental with a touch of whimsy, this is the kind of film that critics love to bash, a film that does reasonably well at the box office and then sets rental and purchase records once released on DVD and videotape. This is a family film to be watched again and again; no Disney classic, but a very delightful visit with two old codgers and their newly-arrived nephew, a used lion, a pulsating field of corn, some greedy relatives, and bags of money. The ride is well worth the price of admission.

Driving across the dusty roads of 1960s Texas, Mae (Kyra Sedgwick) tells her little boy Walter (Haley Joel Osment) that she is about to drop him off with his two uncles. Walter turns to her and says, "You're an only child. I know what uncle means." In his few years on earth, he has seen his mom entertain a variety of men. This time she claims that she's "off to court reporting school in Arizona", that a man she met arranged a special acceptance for her. Later, when Walter calls the school, he finds they have never heard of her; when he receives a letter from her, even though she maintains the 'Arizona court reporting school' sham, the letter bears a Las Vegas postmark.

Garth (Michael Caine) and Hub (Robert Duvall) McCaan are really Walter's grand uncles, and they have no use whatsoever for a teenaged intruder. To them, life has become afternoons on the porch, passing their waning days in their rocking chairs, a chaw of tobacco tucked up against their gums, five dogs and one old pig at their feet.

"Oughta be another salesman comin' by in about two more hours or so," Garth says to Hub, caressing the barrel of his shotgun.

It's not as if the McCaans haven't made it clear to salesmen that they are not wanted. The signs along the private road to their farm declare: TURN BACK! DO NOT ENTER! GO NO FURTHER! RADIATION! DEATH! GO AWAY!

Rumour has it that, after an absence of 40 years, the McCaan brothers returned with a fortune, millions upon millions of dollars now hidden somewhere on their property. Fully aware of the possibly-fatal greeting that awaits, salesmen still are drawn to the McCaan farm as proverbial moths to flame.

Even more than the visits from salesmen, the McCaan brothers resent the intrusion of their money-hungry distant relatives, and they do not view Walter's arrival as anything different. They soon become aware, however, that Walter is not after their money; he's just a kid who has been abandoned by his mom. He is nothing like Ralph and Helen, and their three bratty kids, who call too often and kowtow to Garth and Hub in an attempt to assure an inheritance. In fact, when the uncles see that Ralph and Helen hate Walter, Garth and Hub extend a sort of acceptance to the boy.

Nevertheless, they tell Walter that they know nothing about raising a child, announcing that he is and will be completely on his own. They show Walter to the 'tower', a small bedroom at the top of three flights of stairs. It is here, at the bottom of a dusty trunk, that Walter discovers the photograph of a beautiful exotic woman.

Hearing a noise one night, Walter follows Hub out to the pond. Uncle Hub seems to be talking to unseen gods, fighting a battle, reliving a dream. Walter is about to wake his sleepwalking uncle when Uncle Garth stops him.

In answer to Walter's query regarding Uncle Hub's behaviour, Garth says he will relate a story. Uncle Garth proves to be a splendid raconteur and his account no ordinary tale. Moreover, as the McCaan farm includes no telephone or television among the amenities, Walter treasures the yarn his uncle imparts... The episodes present the only source of entertainment available to the lonely boy.

Garth commences the saga of two young men on a visit to Europe. They arrive to the announcement that the German Army is moving; it's the beginning of the Great War. They decide they will stay and enjoy Europe until the very last minute. On their final night, the two young world travellers share drinks with a stranger in a Paris cabaret. Instead of waking up on their ship bound for America, they wake up bound and hung over in the hold of a cargo ship. They have been drugged and shanghaied, and are soon to be conscripted into the French Foreign Legion.

Uncle Garth tells Walter that Hub became the best swordsman the world has ever seen, that he could take on a whole army by himself. We are treated to several Indiana Jones-style flashbacks. A handmaiden, saved from villains by Hub, recounts the tale to her princess. The princess, betrothed to a Sheik with many wives, seeks out Hub. They fall in love and run away together. The Sheik puts a large ransom on Hub's head.

Walter is fascinated, but looking at Hub the next day he cannot quite believe this is the man in Garth's story. He is about to question Uncle Hub further when a truck arrives with a delivery. It is a lion.

Garth and Hub have bought a lion, a used lion, an ancient relic from a circus. Their intent is to hunt and kill it. The lioness, however, is old and tired. She takes to Walter, becomes his pet, and takes up residence in the corn field.

A minor flaw in this film is that the cornfield noticeably expands and contracts. It commences as a few rows of vegetables. Garth and Hub are not truly gardeners or farmers, but they buy seed from one of their travelling salesmen and start a garden because Garth says, "This is what retired people do." Anyone who has ever planted corn knows that its 'seeds' are kernels of corn, quite distinguishable as corn and only corn. Yet Garth, Hub and Walter plant these believing some are tomatoes, some carrots, some squash and some lettuce. Not likely. Nonetheless, they end up with about thirty rows of corn; yet in scenes where the lion makes the garden her sanctuary, the small patch of corn becomes a field of possibly an acre. In a later scene, it returns to the original thirty rows.

One sunny day, Garth, Hub and Walter visit town to pick up their special order, a ton of Purina Lion Chow in 50 pound bags. Hub refuses to wait for loading assistance from the merchant and begins hefting the bags into the back of his old pickup. Just as he is about to drive away, Hub suffers a heart attack. After only a few days in the hospital, Hub "checks himself out" and drives Garth and Walter to a restaurant for ribs. Our ersatz farmers and game-keepers are enjoying a delicious meal when four punks enter the cafe. They make the mistake of confronting and insulting Hub. One of them is foolish enough to reveal a switchblade.

This scene represents a turning point in the film, because up until now we the audience, along with Walter, surmise that all of Garth's tales have been big fibs. Hub single-handedly knocks some sense into all four lads at once, then invites them out to the farm for a steak barbecue. Walter's doubts about his uncles' past exploits fade.

Hub gives the four ruffians a speech that he will later give Walter, a speech for boys on the verge of manhood. It basically consists of this: "Find something that makes you happy and believe in it. Even if it turns out not to be true, if believing it makes you happy, never stop believing."

To say more about the plot would be to give it away; suffice it to say that the end crowns the work. However, a great deal has been written about the performance of these three fine actors, yet a little more could be said.

Haley Joel Osment (The Sixth Sense) gives a stellar performance as Walter, the thirteen year old boy who has been abandoned on his uncles' farm. For one of so few years, he is quite capable of turning on a smile or pulling out the tears with equal aplomb. Perhaps you will recognize him as Tom Hanks' son in Forrest Gump, though he has grown up a bit. His father and his sister are also actors. Expect more good things of this young man in years to come.

Robert Duvall is the quintessential character actor and one hell of a leading man as well. From his enactment of the surfing marine in Apocalypse Now to his (and my) favourite role of Augustus 'Gus' McCrae in Lonesome Dove, to his part here as Hub McCaan, he maintains and portrays dignity, steadiness and wry goodness. He is an American treasure.

Michael Caine is another great, and he delivers a credible performance here as the 'lesser brother'. I felt he was delightful and convincing. Nonetheless, a controversy arose over Mr. Caine's accent. True, even to my ear it was not quite Texan, but it certainly gave no hint of his English heritage. One of those protesting the loudest was a fellow countryman, Jamie Russell of BBCi, who said, "Sir Michael's Southern drawl requires a leap of faith beyond the reach of most Olympic athletes." I think Mr. Russell was merely attempting to be clever. He went on to say that Mr. Caine and Mr. Duvall were playing "a pair of aging hillbillies".

Hillbillies in Texas? Not since George Bush moved to Washington.